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Chocolate Rules

September 24, 2009

Worth Repeating

  • If you’ve got melted chocolate all over your hands, you’re eating it too slowly.
  • Clearly, chocolate is a vegetable. Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. A bean is a vegetable. Wait! There’s more! Sugar is derived from either sugar cane or sugar beets. Both are plants, which places them in the vegetable category. QED: chocolate is a vegetable.
  • Chocolate-covered raisins, -cherries, -orange slices and -strawberries all count as fruit. Eat as many as you want. Fruits are an important part of the Food Pyramid.
  • Hot tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It’ll take the edge off of your appetite and you’ll eat less.
  • If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
  • Money talks. Chocolate sings. 
  • Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. Therefore, chocolate is therapeutic.
  • Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you’ll get one thing done.
  • A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn’t that handy?
  • If you can’t eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can’t eat all your chocolate, what’s wrong with you?clip_image001

No, Really

One of the most surprising super foods to hit the headlines is dark chocolate. It is loaded with health-promoting polyphenols — anti-oxidants that may help lower blood pressure and promote vascular health. Cocoa has more polyphenols than red wine or green tea. But to qualify, the chocolate must contain at least 70 percent cocoa solids.

Recently, Hershey introduced an extra dark chocolate that touts anti-oxidant power equal to three cups of tea, two glasses of red wine or 1 1/3 cups of blueberries. Impressive stats, but the company Web site ( points out that scientists are still investigating exactly how anti-oxidant scores relate to their activity in the body.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. September 25, 2009 4:20 am

    Hi Jennifer, I somehow knew you would have a pure enjoyment post today. Busy and hectic sounds more like what’s going on and I vote for chocolate anyday. Good luck with your husband’s new job and may the road go easier for us all.


  1. Twitted by MaidenShade

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